that's what they said...

I haven't really highlighted the hilarity of people's wit in this country, so I figured I'd take this lull in activity due to the rainy season (and other things to be explained in another forum) to do so. Actually, I still don't always understand the Burkinabé sense of humor, but the following are just situations that made me laugh:

**It seems as if the first three scenarios are condom related for some reason**

1. A few weeks ago, I got it into my head that I wanted to make myself an omelette for dinner, and I was in Ouahigouya for the day, so I figured I'd pick up some eggs there and take them home and have a delicious protein filled meal. I went to all the places where you can normally get eggs, to no avail. Every place in Ouahigouya was out of eggs. So annoying. Naturally, I expressed this annoyance at not being able to find a single egg for miles, to my friend, the lady who was working at the last place I looked, a small alimentation on my way home. Here is how the conversation played out:

Me: I want some eggs

Alimentation lady (AL): The eggs are finished

Me: What?? Ugh.

AL: All the chickens have been wearing condoms

Me: What??

AL: I SAID, ALL the chickens have been wearing condoms

Me: That's not cool. They shouldn't do that.

AL: Why not? Isn't it you guys that are always talking about family planning? You always say that we shouldn't have so many kids, don't you?

Me: Yeah, but chickens aren't people! They need to have as many kids as possible.

AL: Oh, why, so you can eat them?

Me: Yes.

2. I was having a meeting with a bunch of women at the CSPS, when the 2 year old daughter of the midwife came up to me holding a female condom. (We have a bunch of them available at the CSPS). Her name is "La vielle", and yes, if you speak French, her name does translate to "The old woman".

La vielle: Ilana, what's this?

Me: Why? What do you want with that? Who gave that to you?

La vielle: It's mine!!

Me: It's a condom.

La vielle: It's my condom.

I hear loud, obnoxious laughter, and I look over to see the midwife peeking her head around the corner along with the pharmacist, cracking up. Nice.

3. I've been doing a lot of condom demonstrations lately, and subsequently, people have actually been interested in trying them out! This pleases me. Anyway, I was sitting with the women in my courtyard before I left to go to the CSPS for the morning, and they were all telling me to bring them back condoms when I got home at mid day. As I was walking away, Sapoca, the 4 year old wonder-child who thinks she's 30, screams after me: "Ilana!! Don't forget to bring the condoms back for us!"

4. Sapoca (same wonder-4-year-old) typically comes into my courtyard at around 530 in the morning, waking me up, wanting to hang out. So, à cause de ca, she's typically around when I'm eating breakfast. We were sitting on my lit-pico (the cot type thing I sleep on which lives outside) eating bread for our breakfast and a girl came around selling samsa, a delicious, oily treat made from beans and flour. I was feeling especially hungry this particular morning, so I bought a bag of it, which I planned to eat later on. Sapoca clearly wanted me to give her some samsa, but she just sat there for a minute without saying anything, and then the following conversation ensued:

**For some reason this conversation is hard to translate into English that makes sense, so I'll write it in Mooré first and then translate it**

Poca: Ohh, Ilana, saamsa yaa baase. Ohh, Ilana, that samsa will make you sick

Me: Boen yinga? Alla yelle? Why? Who says?

Poca: Kaam menga yaa baase. The oil itself is illness.

Me: Pa baase ye, Poca! Yaa soma. No it isn't!! Poca, this won't make me sick.

Poca: Yaa baase. Lobge. Tug n lobge! It's illness. Throw it out. Go and throw it away! (waves finger angrily at me).

Me: Mam pa na n lobge ye. Fo data ti mam lobge la fo paam n dik n diibo. Pa sida? I'm not going to throw it out. You just want me to throw it out so you can go get it and eat it. Right?

Poca pauses. Then starts giggling. Smart kid. (She's heard me talk to the women about how too much oil is bad for you). She's getting old enough to be manipulative it seems. But it's funny.